In a shocking move, David Lee Roth Rejoins the brothers Halen for the first time since 1984, which studies show is unable to heal decades of a parrotheaded troll obsessed with rhyming words that sound like "Cabo". Scat-singing and sailor costumes prevail, and the ol' switcharoo happens at long last with Roth and Hagar.

The Smashing Pumpkins (AKA "Billy Corgan does GnR") reforms, minus essentials James Iha and D'arcy Wretsky. A full page article in the Chicago Sun-Times by Iha stated "I play for A Perfect Circle now, kiss the rings." The old switcharoo for Iha/Wretsky is performed by ex-pumpkin Melissa Auf Der Maur and a to-be-named live guitarist.

In yet another reformation of nineties greatness and powertripped nostalgia, Amphetamine Reptile Records reforms! ...Just kidding. The recently reformed Page Hamilton's Helmet continues to tour, having switched ex-bassist Henry Bogned and ex-guitarist John Stainer for the new lineup of Chris Traynor, Jeremy Chatelain, and Mike Jost. Helmet continues on anew.

Derek Roddy leaves Hate Eternal and is filled in by Kevin Talley (Ex-Decrepit Birth, Dying Fetus, The Red Chord)... "The old switcharoo" is performed on one of progressive death metal's most unique and drum-hungry groups to as-of-yet-unseen success.

Meanwhile, Roddy's only known rival in this world, Tim Yeung (also ex-Aurora Borealis, and also previously of Hate Eternal), continues to provide live session drums for Vital Remains, who's inhumanely heavy "Dechristianize" is said by the group to be topped this year by it's follow-up, recorded and produced by none other than Erik Rutan (of...Hate Eternal). Once you pop, the fun don't stop.

In the midst of the confusion, Robert Fripp Makes the temporary switch from King Crimson sound-scientist to Windows Vista guitarist, recording a plethora of sounds for the new OS using only his Gibson Les Paul, a studio, and a lot of time...